Tip Top Vegetarian Pit Stop

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Settling into my favourite window seat at Maoz I find the delicious, wholesome, vegetarian, calorie surge fuels a wave of ruminations.

I hunger for flesh but my scientific understanding of the declining biosphere leaves me with no doubt. Gaia wants us to eat less meat.

The trouble is, vegetarian options so often dim morale. Who hasn’t suffered in a decent restaurant when an earnest vegetarian friend (lets call him Rich) has to poke at an uninspiring and soggy asparagus risotto. Most likely, with the dismal knowledge that the green stuff was flown in from Peru.

Restaurants flunk so often because cooking meat is the easy option – who can’t roast a chicken well or stick some cheap meat in a dish to boost the calories?

His n hers

His n hers

A delicious meat fest couldn’t be easier – in the case of steak you just fry it. The steaks we bought on Valentines day from Whole Foods provided a carnal, atavistic pleasure only bested by what was to follow.

Rather than abstaining I attempt to eat only the best meat – infrequently. As a passionate food enthusiast the only hope I have on this quest is to find great vegetarian food.

A delicious and satisfying vegetarian meal takes more skill often requiring a diversity of ingredients.

In the UK great vegetarian pitstops are oases in a bleak apocalyptic landscape of factory-tormented animals that are so distorted by the time they reach us they could be minced Monsanto Lab Rats™.

We share the knowledge with reverence and gratitude like parched pilgrims questing for deliverance.

Maoz piles its fine ingredients high like offerings to The Other. Colourful invitations to gorge without regret.IMG_1080

Only a rookie would order a falafel, which is impossible to adequately fill with the good stuff. The smart move is to order the Falafel Box. This comes with a deconstructed falafel but the space to go to town at the salad bar.

Go easy at the start because the highlight of roasted cauliflower is down the other end. Unlike many impotent vegetarian offerings, at Maoz, once your box is full you should have enough calories to fuel a ride across town, even in these wintery conditions.IMG_1077

Once fully loaded and lavished with sauces, front row seats are available at the beautiful parade on London’s gayest street.

On the other side is The Admiral Duncan. When I was a kid some maniac planted a nail bomb in there.

Aside from being psychotic and evil. He was probably eating too much meat.

don't fuck my planet

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